Its Christmas eve and getting later by the minute. The last Christmas gifts have been dropped off in discrete places at the children's houses (in automobile trunks, coat closets,etc).. for their children's delight tomorrow morning.
Ma is putting the finishing touches on tomorrow's contribution to the newest inlaws Christmas family dinner and me, well, I am just glad that I was able to do my part this year. Wasn't always that way for a long time.
So, to indelibly mark this evening as the first (ever?) with no single children of our own in house I thought I would recite my parody of "The Night before Christmas", gleefully written when I was in the 7th or 8th grade. In a way, its something of a time capsule because it was penned at the very beginning of the space age, around 1957. Sputnik was up and rocket science was the new standard of intelligence.
Twas the night before Christmas and all through our hut
nothing was stirring not even the mutt.
The longjohns were carelessly hung in despair
for the dog on the floor wouldn't let Santa in there.
Ma in her kerchief and I in my robe
had just settled our ears for a long winter's lobe
The children were nestled all snug in their bunks
and the guy on the bottom had the hiccups.
Then suddenly outside a loud noise made no sense
But I knew in a moment Santa had run through our fence.
Away to the window I flew like a flash
Tripped on a shoe and sailed through the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow
gave a luster of midday to my body below.
Then just as I dragged myself up from the snow
what in the world do you think would show?
but a miniature Vangard to Santa had been sold
(For his reindeer, poor things, had a cold)
Away to the roof top he blasted away
and tore through my gutter in his own reckless way.
Then up on the rooftop I heard Santa yell and down the chimney he fell
(The chimney was dirty and needed a cleaning so I left the broom there with no harmful meaning)
Up in the chimney there came such a rumbling
and out on the floor Santa came tumbling.
He was so round and so quick
I thought for a moment it must be Sputnik.
He spoke not a word but went straight to his work,
filled all the longjohns then turned with a jerk.
At last over in the fireplace Santa Clause knelt
and turned the knob on his gravity belt.
Again on the roof top I heard Santa yell
(The broom tripped him again and down he fell).
But I heard him shout as he shot out of sight
Merry Christmas to all on this dangerous night.